Alaran History: Humans

(Note: This history has been disproved up to about 800 E.F. by a discovery of Thulin Thunderboot.  Everything else is still true.)

The Humans of the Civilized Lands have a history which, though not as long as the histories of their neighbors the elves, dwarves, and minotaurs, not as depressing as the history of the njorlghar, and not as heavily involved in hallucinogens as the history of the Satyrs (frickin’ satyrs… gettin’ high all the time), is, to put it lightly, action-packed.

~E.F. ? (Eptan Fael – literally, The Year of Emptiness.. it was named by fanatical Archus worshippers who were also emo poets) – Most of human history is not known. In fact, the origins of humanity are something constantly argued about by many prominent scholars. The religious fanatics say that humans were one of the races created by the young gods to fight their elders before the world exploding, and thus you will find humans on every continent. Homostin of Wyrmspire insists that the humans of the Civilized Lands migrated from the north, though he’s not sure what this means in terms of origins. Some scholars think that humans changed over time from a lower life form that, though human-like, was rather hairier, but they’ve been locked up, and quite frankly, they’re wrong.

~E.F. 3,800 – What is known of human history starts roughly five thousand years ago, with the human invention of bronze weapons. This new metal allowed the various roaming tribes to start killing various other roaming tribes, and the entirety of the Civilized Lands was plunged into violence. This ended with the coming of Ulëndras the Mighty, an incredibly powerful dragon. It is not known from whence Ulëndras came, but it is known that he was not any kind of dragon known upon current Alara – he was what is referred to in what records there are as a Royal Dragon, though no one knows what the hell that means.

Ulëndras took power over a tribe of humans, and the Civilized Lands soon fell to his followers, succumbing entirely to dragon-worship. Before this, human spirituality consisted of a vague druidic tradition… with trees and stuff. Ulëndras was worshiped both as god and king. It is important to note, here, that as we do not know what sort of dragon Ulëndras was, this may in fact have been closer to the truth than we suspect.

Ulëndras coaxed out of hiding the existing dragons. In those days, dragons were more likely to murder each other than not to, and the other dragons feared for their lives. But Ulëndras did not murder them – in fact, he incorporated them into his rule. With Ulëndras as god-king and the dragons as his enforcers, the empire of Drak’an was forged… the most enduring empire in human history. It is not known where the capital city was, but scholars think that it was on Coronation Isle, the small speck of land in the middle of Crown Lake. It is thought that Crown Lake was lower thousands of years ago, and the city dwarfed even current-day Wyrmspire.

~E.F. 1,300 – At this point, Drak’an has persisted for twenty-five hundred years, and is the most consistent power in the Civilized Lands. However, it has been waning for the past several hundred years… and the people think they know why. Ulëndras, great and powerful god-king of dragons, is growing old. Dragons take an immense amount of time to age, but Ulëndras was not young when he founded Drak’an – and he has certainly not gotten any younger. Scholars estimate that Ulëndras may have been ten thousand years old at this point, though it’s all an unknown, as they still don’t know what the Royal Dragon aging process is like.

The younger dragons under Ulëndras’ power wage war against him. Helped with the dwarven advent of iron weapons, the people join. The Brood of Ulëndras is hard-pressed to defeat their rebelling subjects.

At the height of the war, when Ulëndras’ mighty palace was surrounded by raging dragons and mobs of humans, Ulëndras is killed – by his own son, Dräsilith, who puts down the rebellion with a firm stare and takes control of Drak’an. As dragons are wont to do, Dräsilith kills any dragon older than him or near his age, leaving only those far weaker than him and not of any danger to his rule – the rule of the Brood of Dräsilith (dragons are notoriously vain, and name their families after the current patriarch – history is not given much thought when you can live for three thousand years)

~E.F. 600 – The War of the Twin Spears occurs, which is basically humanity bashing the shit out of the elves, who momentarily ally to fend off the humans. It is one of the bloodiest wars in the history of either race, and what’s worse is that no one can really figure out who started it. If you dig deep enough, you can still find the mass graves that resulted from some of the battles…

E.F. 188 – Dräsilith has turned out to be a far inferior ruler to his father, and though he managed to hold his power for a millennium, he can hold it no more. After summarily executing every last member of his Brood out of paranoia, he is set upon by an alliance of lesser dragons and killed. The last of the Royal Dragons, of the line of god-king Ulëndras, is dead. Drak’an follows. The empire of three and a half millenia falls, turning into a series of states, controlled by a variety of powerful dragons – the Brood of Kharr, the Brood of A’ka, the Brood of Alagaaz, etcetera.

E.F. 42 – Ships arrive from across the Cloudsea, from the land of Luinthras. These ships land in an area controlled by the Brood of Kaa’th, a group at the time too weak to do anything about them. They bring with them messages of peace, messages of a world without dragonkings… messages of a new god. Archus and his pantheon have arrived in the Civilized Lands. The dragonkings are too busy warring amongst themselves to notice, something dragons have been beating themselves over the head about ever since.

E.F. 35 – A boy by the name of Japhasath is born in the region of Ka’ath. The visiting high priest of Archus, who sailed across the Cloudsea on the whim of a dream, declares him the prophet of Archus, the future of the lands. A gathering of Archanites begins to collect around the boy. At this point the dragons should really start noticing stuff, but they’re kind of stupid mega-large lizard things.

E.F. 23 – On the day of Japhasath’s twelfth birthday, Dragonking Ka’ath takes an interest and decides to incinerate the troublesome boy along with his hometown. On seeing him, Japhasath raises his staff to the sky and Ka’ath is struck down by the will of Archus. This begins a rebellion entered into by all of the rather large following of Archus. The dragonkings finally notice.

E.F. 15 – Dragonking Alagaaz, the most powerful of all the kings, disappears completely. Without his protection, his lands, mostly territory in the Dragonmaw Range, quickly fall to the warring Archanites. The Archanites sweep the land, murdering every living thing they come across – human, dwarf, dragon; man, woman, child – it makes no difference, as they see their still living under Algaaz’s wing as evidence of their refusal of Archus. This massacre is known as the Dance of Dying Embers, and is considered the worst thing the Archanites have done in recorded history.

E.F. 4 – An eleven year stalemate is broken when Japhasath marches upon the palace of Dragonking Kharr. He walks right past his guards, into his thrown room, holds out his staff, and commands the king to die. The massive black dragon promptly obeys. His palace falls in a rain of fire, and the corpse of the last remaining dragonking is incinerated.

0 – The Church of Archus, having sent several representatives from Luinthras, founds the Archan Empire, declaring the worship of any Archan god the only acceptable form of religion. Japhasath is offered the crown, but declines. A puppet king is installed by the church.

A.F. (Archan Fael – literally, The Year of Archus) 52 – Japhasath has wandered the land much over the past decades. It is thought that in this time he brought the worship of Archus to the dwarves, the worship of Rudolphus and Omora Agabai to the elves, and generally went around being a nice guy. Japhasath is last seen going into the far reaches of the Dragonmaw Range. When some dwarven priests go to find him, all they find is his staff… resting between a mountain that has been cloven perfectly in two. This mountain is named the Cleft Spire, and is still the most holy site of Archus in all the Civilized Lands.

A.F. 55 – The Church of Archus and all their lackeys receive a message from across the Cloudsea. Immediately, they pack up and leave, promising to return within the decade. They do not keep the promise.

A.F. 60 – The Archan Empire crumbles without the support of the Luinthrans, dissolving into a series of city-states.

~A.F. 75 – A small city in the northern regions of the Civilized Lands turns to the practice of necromancy, naming themselves Túgel Vas, the City of Bones.

A.F. 202 – It has been a century and a half since the departure of the Luinthrans, and the humans have spent most of that time killing each other. Three city-states have emerged ahead of the rest, named Túgel Vas, Dúnel Vas, and Argan Vas – the City of Bones, the City of Kings, and the City of Swords. Dúnel Vas and Argan Vas enter into an alliance. Their combined armies sweep the lands of those stupid enough to resist. Túgel Vas fades into the background, knowing it cannot stand against the twin cities. The eldest children of the two ruling houses are married, and form the newly born House of Niara. Emperor Ethélgar the Great takes the throne of the newly created Niaran Empire.

~A.F. 290 – The First Crusade occurs. The forces of Niara march upon Túgel Vas, determined to destroy its blasphemous presence, which they’ve only recently remembered. It is thought that around this time Zarathas, the first Asilin, was created in an attempt to counter the empire. Something countered it, for after a few years of war, the armies of the empire beat a hasty retreat and resolve never to mention the situation again. Prominent geomancers have dated the start of the degeneration of the Wastes to around this time, so it is thought that some great, land-corrupting spell fended off Niara.

A.F. 307 – The Niaran Empire has become the foremost power of the land, allying with both the elves of the west and the dwarves of Ironforge. In what is considered one of the most hilariously ironic incidents in history, Emperor Edhert the Paranoid is killed by assassins. With his heirs killed in the same night, the House of Riverwish takes control of the empire, though they keep the name Niaran Empire, if only because “Riverwishian Empire” sounds rather lame. Emperor Ashbald the Ruthless takes the throne.

A.F. 352 – Emperor Ashfar the Oblivious is slain by invading minotaurs, beginning a rather embarrassing period in the history of Niara: its period under foreign rule. Emperor Gathak dún Gadh of the House of Karkan takes the throne.

A.F. 370 – After a short and useless rule, Emperor Nuthel dún Gathak is dethroned, stabbed, hung, poisoned, drawn and quartered, burnt, and thrown in pig doings by an irate populace. The House of Atralang comes into rule, beginning the most prosperous period of the Empire of Niara. Emperor Jakben the Red takes the throne.

~A.F. 380 – The Second Crusade occurs. The House of Atralang decides that those damn minotaurs need to be taught a damn lesson in damn manners. So they invade, kill the sitting emperor, and spread the word of Archus. The minotaurs are just fine with Archus, but especially take to the worship of his son, Jurgan, and his friend, Zaran. Ironically, the minotaurs become staunch allies of the empire after this.

A.F. 454 – The Third Crusade, also known as the Forgotten Crusade or A Bad Idea, occurs. Emperor Jakthorn the Blue decides that it’s high time to check up on those damn necromancers again. The armies of Atralang invade, find a scarred land full of about seventeen different factions of warring undead fiends and one faction of beleaguered humans, decide that Túgel Vas has enough problems without them, turn around, and march right back to the Civilized Lands. Jakthorn dies a year later of dysentery.

A.F. 517- Emperor Jakhart the Yellow dies of plague. With no heirs ready to take the throne (his only daughter doesn’t count as an heir, ’cause she’s a chick) the War of Ascension breaks out.

A.F. 522 – The War of Ascension is won. Emperor Larazan the Conqueror takes the throne, marrying Jakhart’s daughter to lend legitimacy to a claim originally enforced with sharp objects. The House of Dargonne now has the throne.

~A.F. 560 – The Fourth Crusade occurs. Emperor Ethélgar Moonbane, upon hearing of the heathen, moon-worshiping, moon-addicted, Moon Dwarves to the north, decides to invade. This goes rather well, and they completely decimate an entirely stable society that has been running fine for thousands of years. Unfortunately, Ethélgar’s two eldest sons, Arug the Princely and Zagan Deathwish, both die in combat, leaving Darius the Mad as the only heir.

A.F. 598 – The people of Argan Vas rebel, assassinating the potentate installed by Emperor Darius and declaring war on their sister city, Dúnel Vas, beginning the First Imperial War. Darius goes completely batshit, declaring war on both the elves and the dwarves for “not helping enough”.

A.F. 602 – Darius is killed by his eldest son, Benedict. Benedict quickly asks for peace with Argan Vas, renames Dúnel Vas Wyrmspire, and declares himself King Benedict I. This is the end of the Niaran Empire, and the beginning of the current period of history.

A.F. 652 – The Alliance is formed, an agreement between the elves, the dwarves, the minotaurs, and the humans of Wyrmspire to not kill each other and maybe occasionally help each other out. Benedict I, the Wise, promptly dies after seeing this through, as he is at this point really friggin’ old.

~A.F. 660 – The Second Imperial War occurs, taking the life of Benedict II, the Avenger. His brother, Carith I, takes the throne.

~A.F. 685 – The Third Imperial War. Through a series of stupidities, Carith II, the Fool, is slain in battle. His brother, Gandin I, the Brave, takes the throne.

A.F. 722 – Gandin II dies with no heirs. The War of Succession, basically a bitch-fight between various second and third cousins, begins.

A.F. 725 – Carith III, the Eye, grandson of Carith II, takes the throne decisively. During this time, he forms an alliance with the Order of the Red Magi. Carith III is often thought to be the most dubiously mage-like of all the kings. Most noble people don’t really truck with mages.

~A.F. 770 – The Fourth Imperial War occurs. Benedict III, the Hammer, is slain in the final battle, leaving his son, Carith V, to take over.

A.F. 798 – Carith V and his son, soon to be Gandin III, are both assassinated in the same night. The young adventurer Benedict IV takes the throne.

A.F. 823 – Present day. Despite many efforts by people on both sides to start the Fifth Imperial War, Benedict IV has thus far prevented it. This is generally considered a good thing. Benedict has three children, named Adrian, Randolph, and Keara. As the eldest two are gigantic twats, it’s generally hoped that Keara take the throne, despite the fact that she is sixteen and refuses to be seen anywhere near the palace.



  1. March 31, 2008 at 8:05 pm

    Dude. That’s really long.

    I like how the kings’ names get more and more formulaic as history crawls along.

    Also, assassinations and violence and shit. Word.

  2. Tusked On His Mom's Laptop said,

    March 31, 2008 at 8:23 pm

    Yeah, the humans have a pretty in-depth history. And some pretty damn formulaic names. Benedict’s always been one of my favorite kingly names, and Carith and Gandin… um, sound kinglyish. Yeah.

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